You're fat and you can't pitch.

Buster Olney earlier today on Pedro Martinez:

Pedro has nothing.

Actually he has a tear in his left calf.

It reminds me of when Doug Buffone interviewed Jerome Williams after he was traded to the Cubs, and criticized him for arriving at spring training twenty pounds overweight. When he asked Williams how he could justify himself, Williams replied that his mother had died in the winter and his father had spent most of the off-season in the hospital, and as a result Williams had no time to exercize.

Ah, repentance.